Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Daily Dose of poorly written vampire... stuff


At the recommendation of a few people lately, I've gone back and started watching HBO's True Blood.  The supposed "what if it were real" vampire series.  I'm only two episodes in, but, so far, not impressed.  


Hit the jump and I'll tell you why.  Then you can flame me.. it doesn't matter, I'll just turn into a bat and fly away dropping bloody shit bombs on your faces.



Alright.  First.  Who the hell is writing this?  I'm not sure what I find more irritating, the awfully drab dialog that makes no effort to add any layers of depth to the so called story line or the D-List actors who deliver them.  I love that it's set in some back-woods Louisiana town, because I get to hear everyone try their damnedest to overact every accent put in front of them.  I mean, seriously, is Bill supposed to be a reincarnation of Elvis?  Because that's sure as hell what he sounds like.  


I'm still not sure where them being vampires comes in to play.  They rarely do any vampire stuff (other than random sex with each other and poor unsuspecting humans) and when they DO, it generally boils down to "wow, look at him move real fast".  Woo.  Color me bored as hell.


As far as actually plot goes, I think I can sum it up here.. let me try.. vampires and sex.  Not that I have anything against HBO's excessive on-screen boobage, and I truly am looking forward to getting to see Anna Paquin's, I'm not sure if I'll be able to make it through the rest of the episodes without trying to drive a wooden steak into MY heart.  


I hope I'm wrong.  I hope it gets better.  Anyone willing to tell me it does?


For good measure, Anna Paquin's boobs.



Kidding.  Are you serious?  That's the ugliest thing I've seen in a bed since Labor Day 2003.  ...what a weekend.

The only shred of resolve is the disgruntled, Black, always wasted single-mother family that serves as consistent comic relief.  Oh.  And that ridiculous grandmother of Sooki's (who I'm pretty sure is going to end up being dead as some point this season).

-Daily Doser

2 comments:

  1. Ha! This guy wrote this review, and then this other guy wrote this comment, and then the web records this interaction as human history. Unbelievable.

    The internet is retarded.

    ReplyDelete

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